What you don't see

To the teacher I took my cranky out on this morning, 

firstly, I want to apologise.

You see, I do get that we are just one family in the school and you have so many more to look out for than just us.

What you don't see though, is the hours of prep that we do around things like excursions.

The thinking and planning for a parent with kids that don't fit the typical mold to do something that is outside the square is huge.

It's the prep around firstly whether my child will go ok on this excursion.  Will they be well behaved, or is it going to be hugely stimulating and will he not be able to regulate?  Will you be able to keep him safe in an unfamiliar environment? Will the lower verbal child be able to participate fully? Will

Do I not sign the permission note and keep him home instead of risking the circumstance where you turn your back for a second and he's gone? 

And does that make me a bad parent for even considering this option and not giving him the opportunity to step up to the challenge. Or does it make me wise in recognising the potential limits here?

So when I sign a permission note, there is already so much thought and consideration having gone into it. 

This means talking about the excursion, what might be different, what they might like, what might freak them out. What the potential risk factors are. What extra tools might we need for this excursion? What do we not need for the normal day?

And then.. you ask me to come along as well. 

You want me to come because you are concerned about some of the behaviour one of my children has been displaying. You are concerned that he's not going to be compliant. I get that. I get that because it's something I've already concidered and already been concerned about. 

However this adds another element. Will it actually be beneficial for me to be there, or will it make it worse, because then there are 2 authority figures and maybe the rules are just a little different when you are with mum than they are with school, because school needs to keep everyone safe, not just the family. 

This also means arranging a day off work. Rearranging clients who in this instance are not mine, and another company's staff around your excursion.  

So, when you cancel an excursion at the last minute, and don't feel that informing the key families that you know this will affect the most, then yep... I get a little pissed off.  

And I get it, it's hard to make the call you need to and let everyone know, but when my dentist can send me an auto generated text that my kids are due for their 12 month checkup, this is something we seriously need to do something about. 

Lets not forget that it's Week 8 of term 4. I'm tired as I'm sure you are. My ability to adapt and change reduces and the stress of the year really weighs on me. I have fought the battles of lego going to school for the year and the regular meetings where I'm told how important communication is so you can factor in what's going on at home.

This just feels like it needs to be a two way street. 

Yours sincerely
Kelly xx